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Identifying The Causes Of Sexual Issues

Sexual issues are something people are not comfortable talking about. There are various factors underlying  sexual problems, and two or more of these factors combined can lead to serious sex related issues.

Let us go over the various concerns that lead to different sexual issues and what can a counselor do to help you overcome them.

Social And Psychological Issues

One can be more vulnerable to sexual issues if there are psychological and social concerns (like premarital pregnancy, which may still not completely accepted by society) underlying them. A counselor can educate you regarding these concerns and help you tackle them.


Absence Of A Sexual Partner

Needless to say, many sexual frustrations can crop up if there is a lack of a partner for a long time. This is a common problem with older people, or those who are divorced or widowed or have not been able to come out of a broken relationship. When they decide to start a new relationship, they may experience guilt or performance anxiety. A counselor can help you come out of the trauma of a previous relationship.

Relationship Problems

If there is perpetual tension and distance between the couple, their sexual life is bound to get affected. Conflict and bitterness lead to sexual issues that become hard to tackle later on. A counselor can help you mend your relationship and end this conflict.

Resentment And Dissatisfaction

Anger, hurt, frustration and tension can lead to sexual problems like erectile dysfunction. This also leads to one or the other partner trying to annoy the other by refusing to indulge in any form of sexual activity. You can seek help from a counselor if you think that this is a reason for unhappiness with your sex life.

Lack Of Proper Communication

To build trust and a healthy relationship, proper and open communication is essential. A healthy dialogue helps the couple to be happy together and have a healthy sexual life. Needless to say, a third person perspective on such issues is always helpful.


If sexual activity is a routine, it is bound to get monotonous. The need fades away with time and causes many sexual issues. A sex therapist can aid you in techniques like Master’s and Johnson’s or other such methods to improve your sexual life.

Performance Anxiety

The fear of not being able to perform leads a person to not performing! Seek professional help before the anxiety becomes a serious issue for your sex life.

Self Image And Self Worth

If you don’t love and respect yourself, you cannot satisfy another person sexually. So get assistance from a counselor if you are not able to perform sexually before your self esteem decreases further. It is a trap that further heightens the problem.

Hopes, Fantasies And Past Experience

Sex drive is natural and innate. Your family values and views, the society that you live in, your religion, culture – all shape up your sexuality. You add your own sexual experiences to it and that results in satisfaction or dissatisfaction in your sexual life later. A counselor will help you get rid of your past beliefs and values that may be false or not in sync with your current situation.

Tension And Issues Related To Stress

Fatigue and tension lead to a major fall in the libido. Midlife crises are many and the sex drive takes a back seat in order to fight everyday stress like aging parents, struggling teenagers, finances, health and the list seems to be endless. There is no time to satisfy your sexual desires when your mind is preoccupied with unending worries. A counselor will help you learn relaxation techniques and get rid of your everyday stress so that you can enjoy your life to the fullest.

Don’t worry! Thankfully your world has not come crashing down. When you identify the reasons for your sexual issues, it becomes quite simple to deal with them. You can always figure out ways of coming out of these problems. Even if you can’t, you can seek professional help… and start afresh with your sexual life!

If you believe you may benefit from sexual issues counseling, we invite you to contact us to set an appointment today. Please call us at (916) 412-5679 or fill out our contact form to the right, and one of our trained counselors will be in touch with you shortly. All prices are on a sliding scale based on your income.

meet dawn, our founder

Dawn T Barry Hulme, Director, Marriage and Family Therapist MFCC 50153, Masters in Psychology with emphasis in Marriage and Family Therapy

As the founder and lead counselor of Windows of Hope Counseling Center, it was my hope to create a non-profit agency offering effective and affordable counseling to the community. It is my belief that everyone deserves to be nurtured and supported during their healing process. Many times while on our life journey we can become confused and experience difficulty finding our way. My hope is to help clients become anchored so that when life difficulties become part of their journey they stay flexible while keeping their direction intact. I specialize with couples and individuals using "Imago" therapeutic techniques along with mindfulness based practices.

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